Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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