think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
