i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize