I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
