Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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