Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
