I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize