Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
