You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
