lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
