sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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