Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
