I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
