I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
