Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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