Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
