I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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