I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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