She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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