Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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