Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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