Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
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