that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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