im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
