it wasn't lemon gatorade
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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