and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
