oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
