DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize