a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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