My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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