She announced her abortion via fbk
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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