the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Randomize
