He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
