She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
