So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I need a beard to bite.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
