why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
