Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
