brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
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