I don't usually arrange sex via text message
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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