I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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