Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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