totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
