Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Randomize
