it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
