Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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