You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
