How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
