Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize