im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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