I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Buhtt sex?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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