they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
