he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
