What a fucking waste of an outfit
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I think your dad took our porno
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
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